Tales From Technical Support Content
If your computer "just quits working" and the hard drive works in an external caddy - try pulling out one stick of RAM at a time and running it that way...before trying anything else.
It's cheaper to replace a stick of RAM than it is to replace the whole computer thinking that it has died...
And you don't loose all your documents & photos because you'd never made a back up as you have a GOOD brand of computer.
Some research later and the computer is running again on half the RAM - but the attempted recovery wiped out "everything" - so it is a clean install & the files are gone.
On the bright side, Dude now loves HIS Dell!
Received trouble ticket from user: "Red light on printer... fix something."
Replaced the PCU (photoconducting unit, i.e., the drum. The display was telling that to the user!)
I could not resist entering the following problem resolution: "something fixed."
Several years ago while working for a ISP we had a customer call and after we did some bsic checking we rrealized that he needed to get a program that would do a defrag and such on his computer before we could go any futher. My associate recommeded a program called oil change and told the customer to call back once he had used that.
After about a week the customer calls back and says "I Changed the oil and now its not working. Should I have used a heavier weight than 10W-40?
While working tech support in 1999. I had a cutomer call in and say. "Ever Since I poured the water out aftr the Huricane went through everything has worked ecept the Modem. Is there another way to get on the internet without it?"
The red light printer story below reminded me of something...
At home I have a laser printer installed in some shelving next to my desk. One night I was printing handouts for a work presentation for early the next morning and the printer starts flashing a red light. The printer is in a middle shelf with only an inch clearance at the top to the above shelf, so I can't really see what the error is. I look at the online manual and it says a flashing red light is the drum/fuser unit which lasts 10,000 pages before it needs replacing. I guessed I had probably done about 5,000 to 10,000 pages since I bought the printer, so maybe its due for replacement. So in a hurry I bolted to the late night stationery store and bought a new drum/fuser unit for $200 cash and didn't keep the receipt. I bolt home and I'm in a hurry to get it done, so I busted open the box for the new drum/fuser. I then pull out the printer from the shelf to get better access. Then I see the flashing red light is actually saying "ADD PAPER". DOh !
I work at a college where the campus WiFi requires your username and password. During a recent conference I attended, there were many guests, so guest accounts were set up for all attendees, and a dedicated staff member was assigned to help walk people through the process of activating the accounts and getting online.
After logging into the network with a userid and password, the next step is to pull up a web browser to register that particular device. Because some wireless devices don't have a web browser, a site is available where you can register your device's MAC address so it can get online.
During this conference, I heard the woman complaining to another staff member about the process. Apparently, one of the guests had somehow ended up on the page where you register the MAC address. I heard her say, "I don't understand why he needs to put in a MAC address. He's not using an iPad."
A "network export" who doesn't know the difference between a Mac and a MAC...
Fixed a laptop that went bad months ago with a little trouble-shooting involving removing one stick of RAM & trying to boot it up, then switching that stick of RAM for the other one & trying again.
It works with one stick of RAM in place, but not the first or both sticks of RAM in place. Ergo, the one stick is bad so I left it out of the laptop so that it would work.
This halved the amount of RAM in the laptop.
DH tried working on it and complained that it was much slower than it had been before I "fixed" it and did a clean install of the factory image from recovery disks (trying to do that with a failing stick of RAM had caused issues with the first attempt at a repair of the OS - so the hard drive was formatted).
Does it take a Vulcan to get the logic of "half the total RAM died and was removed so only half the original RAM amount is available now"?
I do have more RAM on order - it just isn't here yet. It will go faster once I upgrade the RAM to two sticks of faster RAM, I promise.
In 1986, at the age of 18, I started charging people for computer services, and I haven't stopped yet, though some of the things I've been through, have made me want to go into another line of work, many times. In the last 28 years, I've run into every kind of computer issue imaginable: hardware problems, software problems, configuration problems, network problems, and wetware problems, which are the worst. I have hundreds of stories to tell, but will start with the most recent.
I have a long time friend, whose income and therefore, existence depend on working online from home. Thus, any computer problem that keeps him from working online is a major crisis for him. I should also let you know, that this guy doesn't seem to have a memory for details - you could tell him all the same jokes all over again if you wait a few months, and he'd laugh just as hard, because he doesn't remember having heard them before, and it's the same for any computer issue we've dealt with for almost two decades: every time is the first time.
I got a message from him, saying that the Blue Screen of Death would come up every few days, usually when the computer was on but not being used. I asked him for the STOP code, reminding him that it starts with 0x, just as I'd done every other time one of his computers had blue screened in the past 18 years, only to be told "there were horrible sounds coming out of the speakers. It sounded like the computer was dying, so I turned it off quickly to end both our misery."
OK, without that STOP 0x code, I can't help you, man, just like we've been through dozens of times in the past, and like I've said many times before, turn your speakers off, then write down the STOP code!
A few days later, I get a message from him, after another BSOD, where he'd typed out every last code that had been displayed, which is a long list of hex numbers, only one of which I needed, the STOP code that starts with 0x! (He calls it the OX code, like Babe the Blue [screen] OX.)
So, after looking up the STOP code in the context of his hardware and OS, I find that the issue was corrected with a Hotfix, sometime in the middle of last year, and then the fix was included in an Update in the following cycle. I sent him a link to the Hotfix, and asked why he hadn't been updating his OS. It seems that he doesn't have the time and bandwidth to update his OS, until something stops working, at which point he says, "I don't have to worry about all that stuff, because when something stops working, I have your big giant brain to fix the problem for me." At least he's made good on the payments and trade over the years, but he definitely owes me after this one!
There are more stories of my 28 years in the trenches fighting wetware issues of L-Users and 1D-10Ts coming up.
Recently one of my roommates who has a laptop with a bad battery couldn't figure out why it wouldn't turn on. I go over to diagnose the issue and it turns out she didn't connect the power cord to the power brick. No wonder it wouldn't work. So plugged it in and whaddya know...power. Told her next time to check to make sure both ends were plugged in from the wall to the power brick.
